The Stockholm Syndrone Game

Ok so you might have heard of the game bullshit, yeah? Well this is nothing like it except that it is. It's the same but different. Clear? ... Yeah? Thought so. You'll need at least two suckers to play this game beyond yourself. One sucker and a douche bag beyond yourself will do at a pinch.

Step 1.

Take a full deck, except Jokers. Shuffle it well.

Step 2.

Deal the deck evenly between all players/douche bags. Put the two Jokers aside onto the Joker stack.

Step 3.

Left of the dealer plays first. Play any number of any card you want. Say it out loud like "three twos" or what ever but put the cards face down in the middle. (Note to the wise: a king and a queen and a seven is the same as a pair of twos to those who can't see your cards! Yeah that's right, three cards could be two if you bullshit well enough!)

Step 4.

Left of the last guy plays next. But if the last guy played a Joker, put all played cards aside and play whatever you want (i.e. don't worry about step five, play what ever you can get away with). The Joker goes back on the Joker stack.

Step 5.

The options are play any number of cards next in sequence (like three fours after two threes) or call BULLSHIT!

IF you call BULLSHIT:

IF the last dude DID NOT play what they said they played, THEY pick up all the cards played so far and you get a Joker (in order; from the dude who cheated, the Joker stack, or then from any other douce bag (your choice)). Put the Joker face up in front of you, NOT in your hand.
IF the last dude DID play what they said they played, YOU pick up the cards. The last dude gets a Joker (in order; from the dude who said you cheated, the Joker stack, or then from any other douce bag (your choice)).
EITHER WAY the next dude to the left (of the dude who called bullshit) plays next. Calling BULLSHIT is your turn.

IF you play cards:

You can play however many cards of what ever type you want. But remember, if the next dude calls bullshit (and you lied), you're screwed! So be carefull in what you play! You should play 4s on 3s, Js on 10s, etc. You shouldn't skip anything (but you can if you bullshit well enough). 2 is low, A is high and you must play a 2 on an A. Get it? Yeah, thought so.

OR you can play a Joker if you have one in front of you. If you play a Joker, scrap the cards played so far. Put them aside and that's it. No one may at look at them! The Joker you played goes back on the Joker stack. It's the next dude's turn now.

YOU CANNOT CALL BULLSHIT IF IT'S NOT YOR TURN! But you can sow the seeds of doubt in others! (How could she play play two 3s if I've got three 3s in my hand you douche bag?)

Step 6.

Was the last card (or cards) you played the last card (or cards) in your hand (not including jokers douche bag) ? If so, you MUST say "Kneel before Tod!". Yep, thems the rules. If you don't and you're called on it by another player, you must pick up the deck. You've got like 2 seconds to say it, and that's all and then you must pick up the deck. If you don't say it, you still pick up the deck, Tod is that AWESOME (once someone catches you).

And that's it. This game is not bullshit and you know it. But it is, if you play it. Yeah you get me.

Step 7.
So WTF are Jokers for? You can play a Joker on your turn (if you have one) instead of playing a regular card. This means you put all cards played so far aside, they don't have any more part of the game. The Joker then goes back on the Joker stack.

Step 8.
If you got this far you are a true stalwart of the game. Spread the Stockholm Syndrome as far and well as you can.

Step 9.
If you got this far, you are pretty crap at spotting my bullshit! Good luck douche bag!

Step 10.
Don't use douche bag so much as these guys made the typist do. It's demeaning to typists everywhere. Plus the whole "dude" thing? I mean please...

P.S.
This game was invented and first played by an Australian contigent conisting of the Hegarty brothers Paul and Ben plus their host Stuart Jarvis, in the Swedish city of Stockholm. Date of the first game with oficial rules was 2008/12/27. Booyah.

Paul's rant: This is a Picadilly line service to Cock Fosters, (he he he) please mind the gap between the train and the station. Please stand clear of the doors, stand clear of the doors.

P.S.S.
This game makes a kick ass drinking game.